It's not much but it's something

I have very very few friends, but the ones I have, I appreciate more than anything. They understand when I'm going through hard times, when I'm struggling with something, when I need to be somewhere, or when I can't hang out. Today, was a pretty hard day. Especially walking around, realizing how many people don't talk to me anymore. I've blown them off, and I didn't make a good impression. People really dislike me now, and dread talking to me. Today, it was weird when I was in the car. Because I know Sully is a little kid, but he's known A LOT about me, because how close I've been to his family. And today, when he said "You should go to sheldon, then you and avieta could always see each other. Wouldn't you be happy?" And then I realized, I don't update people on my life anymore. I'm anti-social, and that's the fucking root of my problems. No one knows what's going on with me anymore, or how I'm doing, or what I'm struggling with. When I was walking around school today, no one said hi, when I tried talking to people I used to talk to, they told me to go find some friends. Is there something wrong with my attitude? It was clearly visible I wasn't in a good mood, at all. I was sitting on the bench, and Sean got up, and said "Let's go on a walk." He was the only one to really talk to me today, and he could tell something was wrong. I talked to him, as we walked around the school, and I told him what was wrong. For someone, that was just an accquiantance, he helped more than most of my "friends" did. I never actually, felt the way I did today. I felt like something was ending, or gone. I felt terrible. I really wish people would understand.